Things not to say

[Homer]

I yelled "Release the Kracken" last night during sexy-time. 
I recommend against it. 

What are things you've learned not to say?

[Porkchop]

"Honey, I really enjoyed you best friends porn film. Call her and see if she wants to make another".

- Porkchop

[dohabee]

I saw a comedian do a bit about how it is impolite not to give a girl some king of warning at the end of a BJ.

His solution involved a NASA like count down "T minus 10, 9, 8, etc.."

The wife did not find it nearly as humorous as I anticipated.

[Homer]

did not find it nearly as humorous as I anticipated.

Kinda like this thread. 

[Jabilli]

ROFL   "Release the Krakken!"    That has to be the funniest thing I've heard for a while. Can't imagine why that didn't play out so well, I'd crack up if I heard that.

There's always the classic- "Did I leave the oven on?"

Peter Griffins "SHAZAAAM!"

Or the recently popular "Boom goes the dynamite!"

[Elijafir]

Or the recently popular "Boom goes the dynamite!"

Recently popular?  I don't think i've actually heard anyone use that in like 4 years.. back when it was popular...

"That was great, will you go make me a sandwhich?"  Doesn't go over too well unless you have a REALLY great woman.

[seamax]

my favorite one

"Boomshakalaka!"

[Jabilli]

@Elija,
I suppose it is a bit old, but to me 4 years ago seems only like yesterday. Besides I think it was new to me only like a year ago, I'm a bit behind on my memes   :-p

[The Buddha]

The kracken ... well IMHO the movie that blew it involves the kracken. Pirates of the carribean 3, they had the kracken and it was waiting to be the monster of the century in 3, and the stupid thing turned up dead in 3.
Cool.
Buddha.

[Toogoofy317]

I  but when I think of Kracken I think of the ride at Sea World that we lovingly call "The Cracker"

Of course the guys don't like it when we say " your done already?" Or we just fall asleep.

Mary

[bettingpython]

"Why do you think he's going to steal second base? Is it because he's black?"

No one else thought it was funny...