so many of you here know i have had a running battle with prescription drugs and cocaine. i have been on the state methadone program for 3 months now and have been doing great. but yesterday i ran into the wrong person at the right time and wound up coming home with some coke. so as usual i injected it. at first all was fine then uh oh something is wrong here. my heart rate went through the roof and i thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest and i was going to pass out. while lying on the floor i called 911. i have to say i was scared. they picked me up and my heart rate was 180-190 bpm. fortunately within a couple of hours in hospital and some addivan i was OK. they discharged me and i walked home and went to bed. lesson learned....i don't want or need this crap anymore. it is a death trap. to my friends here...thank you for your help and support and please do not use drugs. for those of you who were injured like i was and prescribed Oxycontin and other super strength opiate pain killers, please be careful and lean from my mistakes.
One day at a time, Frankie, one day at a time.
there have been some deaths and injuries in my community from bad coke and i think i got some of that. my guess is it is mixed with methamphetamine which i have never used before. i must say i was really worried and thought that i had over done it and my time may have run out.
Quote from: frankieG on August 28, 2008, 01:14:21 PM
there have been some deaths and injuries in my community from bad coke
Time to stick to Pepsi. Or perhaps Royal Crown, and no, NOT Crown Royal.
No need to be embarassed. No need to apologize. Ever.........at least to me (like I count for anything)
Many have skeletons in the closet yet act aloof. Thank God you aren't one of those.
I hated the spike. I had a little more patience and snorted...........:)
How the hell do u inject coke? mix it with water or something
We snort it over here , and i thought thats how everyone did it , i
It's called the "needle and the spoon"
and of course...........one has to have "a filter"..........
Damn Frankie, just damn...
I know several people who have had those painkillers and had similar thoughts/reactions. I can understand the need. I can't understand how anyone could prescribe that shaZam! though.
Keep a notebook and write in it every single day. Remind yourself of why you're trying to beat this thing. Every time you get the urge, pull out the notebook and read it.
Be careful!
The needle and Spoon , i thought was Herion , Ive never heard of coke that way , Crack cocaine with tin foil , but not coke ,
Either way Frankie , im so glad ur safe , just dont make me come to The Us and Give u a slap for being so careless!! :kiss3:
Dear Frankie, I am vey sorry to hear of your relapse, there is nothing to be ashamed in having a relapse, for some people it is part of their recovery process, it is neither good or bad, it ijust is! With that said I can only imagine how you are feeling about your relapse, but what I do hear is that you were frightened and unhappy with yourself. If addictions in what ever form they manifest in whether it be food, sex, gambeling, shopping, dope, or drink, was an easy thing to overcome then you could buy it on late night t.v. for 3 payments of $39.99, or you could will it to forwitcion, or get it out of a box of captian crunch! I encourage you look into additional help for yourself and your recovery. If you would like to talk or communicate confidentiallly you can pm. I am an addictions counselor and can give you some additional direction and resources to help you! PLease be very carefull with the methadone, bezos and alcohol make it synergistic or multiplier; I have had an ex-patient overdose due to alcohol and methadone. Methadone will only help with cravings and withdrawl symptoms, but it does not address the issues of why you use. Frankie, please take care of yourself! You have many people here that support you! Best Wishes -- JIM
Frankie,
There's no reason for shame or to feel guilty. You learned a valuable lesson from it and that is something that will stick with you forever. I'm just glad you're alright. If you need us, you know we're here for you.
Chris
Frankie, I've been through it with a stepson. It's HELL ON EARTH. Do whatever you have to do to get away from it EVERY DAY. You've got support here and friends here. Not much, but it's something! Hang in there.
Quote from: trumpetguy on August 28, 2008, 10:41:07 PM
Frankie, I've been through it with a stepson. It's HELL ON EARTH. Do whatever you have to do to get away from it EVERY DAY. You've got support here and friends here. Not much, but it's something! Hang in there.
agreed man. when you get the urge. as stated before, pull out the aforementioned notebook, and open this thread and read it. we are here for ya tho :thumb:
thanks guys. i think i may have learnt my lesson. it was not what i expected and it could darn well have killed me. oh please do not tell people how to inject coke...it is better left unsaid. this board is my life and soul. i truly love it here and feel free to tell my deepest secrets without the worry of ridicule. that is a rarity in life and we are fortunate to have gstwins. much of my addiction is to hide from the feelings i have as part of the post traumatic stress from my time in the military. i know it will never go away but i can keep those feelings to a minimum. most of my problems are in my sleep. i fight former battles again and again in my sleep and wake up several time during the sleep cycle kicking and punching things that are not there. i have learned to laugh at it but sometimes it gets the best of me. oh btw when i got home from the hospital i have just over 1/2 a gram of that coke left. i flushed it...which is a first for me. i also got rid of the needles i had in my apt. there was no reason for my slip, it was not a full blown relapse, it just happened. i learned from it and hopefully i will not do it again. i don't want thugs from the UK coming here and beating the crap out of me :)
Good luck with your war. You may have lost this battle, but you survived. Fight another day and come out on top.
Drugs are bad and make people do bad things...and once its got its claws into you, its tough to get away. Rely on your support networks if your feel like your slipping, because its hard to do it on your own.
Not sure just how bad the scene is in NB, but at least you're not hanging around the rig boys in Alta....that crap runs ramped there.
Glad to hear your okay now.
Frankie,
I am a ER doctor.
Injecting coke or "slamming" it is really dangerous. Christ, you want an infection like Hep C or god forbid HIV. You are at risk for a number of things. Thankfully you are posting on gstwins suggesting you are not happy with yourself and looking for support. It is hard to stay away. I see patients like you all the time. You have to surround yourself with good people.
Drugs + motorbike = another statistic
Damnit Frankie everytime I get to the point of hatefulness you remind me we're all human. Deal with your problems not the symptoms. Drug addiction is just a sympton of a bigger problem. You need a healthy outlet to express your frustrations, an hour at the pistol range every week does wonders for my frustartion levels. You need to find that primal urge release that wont hurt you or others.
You got some big time pent up issues and I hope you get help.
3-5 hours every other day lifting like a mad man keeps my anger in check as well as anything could.
the hep c monster did not escape me...it landed right smack in my liver
Stick at it Franko, you will get there mate.
damn, As many others have said already at least you can take this one time with you and think of it God forbid another chance to drop rolls around. Great to know that you know it's a problem and you're not afraid to share/talk about it. We are all here for ya
oh, and no need to be embarrassed, just remember this time if a next time rolls around :thumb:
well i woke up this morning and i had a suprise...my mother sitting in the living room watching tv and waiting for me to get up :oops: oh boy
ya like frankie needs to shoot guns to relax.....since shooting guns probably is the cause of the stress
hang in there buddy
Quote from: frankieG on August 31, 2008, 12:07:04 PM
well i woke up this morning and i had a suprise...my mother sitting in the living room watching tv and waiting for me to get up :oops: oh boy
how did that go?
that went ok...i think ma wants me to buy a place in florida for the two of us to live. in one of those over 55 parks. as for firing weapons i think the only one you could get me out for is a tommy gun. other than that i have done it. everything from a pellet gun to firing from a tank, ship, torpedo blaa blaa blaa i fired, threw or ordered it fired pretty much all of it. i threw a grenade once that did not go off and i had to go look for the f%$king thing to get rid of it, i was not happy with that. i fired a carl g antitank rocket that hit the target(a tank) right in the gun BULLS EYE BABY.
Update time - you hanging in there OK? Staying clean? Behaving your dang self?
Every day is another dang day. Every dang day you have to make the same dang boring right choices. Stick with it.
If you're going to a Florida trailer park, keep going south until you run off the mainland - it's nicer in Monroe County than the rest of Florida. If you're not quite sick and tired of it, you can even go dive, with nobody actively trying to kill you for a change. But the lobstah ain't got no claws to speak of.
(http://www.catscoffeechocolate.com/CaribeLobstah.JPG)
Frankie, did you go to that place they measured the speed of light at for school? If so, you might know a guy I know, being about the right vintage.
Quote from: frankieG on August 28, 2008, 01:06:57 PM
so many of you here know i have had a running battle with prescription drugs and cocaine. i have been on the state methadone program for 3 months now and have been doing great. but yesterday i ran into the wrong person at the right time and wound up coming home with some coke. so as usual i injected it. at first all was fine then uh oh something is wrong here. my heart rate went through the roof and i thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest and i was going to pass out. while lying on the floor i called 911. i have to say i was scared. they picked me up and my heart rate was 180-190 bpm. fortunately within a couple of hours in hospital and some addivan i was OK. they discharged me and i walked home and went to bed. lesson learned....i don't want or need this crap anymore. it is a death trap. to my friends here...thank you for your help and support and please do not use drugs. for those of you who were injured like i was and prescribed Oxycontin and other super strength opiate pain killers, please be careful and leaRn from my mistakes.
done, and done.
i've edited this post 5 times now. 1/2 of me is pissed at you for doing something that stupid. the other half wants to help.
1) how many hours since you almost did yourself in ?
think about it.
how much cool shaZam! you can do in an hour ?
make a fantastic supper ?
change a tire ?
wash a bike ?
wash 20 bikes ?
masterbate 5 times ? (hope you laughed @$$hole!)
man, get some help. beg for help. report the fucker that sold you the junk. get his ass off the streets.
repent.
2) how's about you keep THIS THREAD ALIVE WHILE YOU'RE ALIVE, and post your progress ?
you've got balls telling all about your mistakes here on gstwins. i'll give ya that.
questions 1 and 2 are not hypotheticals or me just pissing in the wind.
Wow, I'm new enough around here I had no idea of your addiction, and i'm sorry to hear it got the best of you. Unfortunately, as you well know, that particular monkey will always be in your closet waiting to jump out and on your back again. What would have happened if you hadn't gotten bad shaZam!? You may well still be using even now. You have to change your lifestyle, and perhaps location. I mean you could move somewhere and not really know where to get something like coke so that seems like it would be less risky? I don't know, I've never abused anything stronger than weed or booze and I drank enough in 6 years of the Marines, I rarely even drink now. Keep fighting the good fight brother, and stay clear of that shaZam!. You can post-whore enough sober, you don't need to get all spiked up :laugh:
indeed frqankie. IVE got a gs, and enough cash to track you ass down should you ever do that crap again :mad: :nono: :icon_confused: ( seriously)
all depends on your personality, certain drugs just arent right for certain people. especially if you have an addictive trait.
ive been prescribed almost every painkiller ever, and have use them occasionally for recreation(in a controlled environment, surely far as f%$k away from any bike)...from oxycondone, morphine, to levorphanol to buprenoprhine...just dont mix your uppers and downers especially with xanax/wellbutrin etc..
im glad your ok, everyone gets their scare and hopefully it can be turned into a lesson for you.
be safe.
that episode sufficiently scared me that i am staying away from that crap.
Frankie, I haven't been around much, and I probably used to flame you for your posts a lot (I don't remember.. but I remember how I acted.. I still mostly act that way :laugh:)
I've done my share of coke, and while I was never addicted (not just denial.. I've only done coke maybe 10 times), I can understand how easy it can be to be addicted. It happens, and you're trying to beat it, which puts you miles ahead of plenty of other poor SOBs out there. Anyway, if you're serious about buying a unit in a 55+ park in Florida, drop me a PM. My parents own several, and I know they're trying to unload at least one of them... I'm sure they'll cut you a better deal than what they have it on the market for.
Quote from: frankieG on September 26, 2008, 03:06:41 AM
that episode sufficiently scared me that i am staying away from that crap.
ill Fuckin make sure you do :thumb: :icon_confused: ;)