:(

[yamahonkawazuki]

Well bro you got it out there. as did i recently teh waiting game is sucky lol aint it. i am pulling for you an. you are a nice person. based from what ive seen ehre on teh board. if shes nto meant to be yours. then the gal who is will be LUCKY. life is full of uppers and downers ( of the legal variety) this is one that could go either way. BUT you said what you wanted to say. so now you wait.. good luck m8 

[Toogoofy317]

You know I guess I'm just not with it knowing what a girl likes. but, I'll give you my two cents if that were me I'd appreciate that note. Even if I wasn't that in to you it would make me feel good knowing that someone sees those qualaties in me. Esp, if it were a good friend who wrote it. Honestly, we don't tell people enough how much they mean to us. Seems like the only times we want to do it is either when they have died or will never see you again. I try very hard to let my friends know what they mean to me and work very hard to keep friendships alive. Why because I believe they are something worth fighting for.

I'm sure I'll get flamed for that but I really don't care. You seem to be in touch with your emotions but a lot of people seem to be against that. I think that makes us a very sad species. Since, we are the only ones that really have been given that gift by God but we don't use it even in love for Him much less for each other.

I will pray that this relationship goes the way it needs to go! Please, don't change who you are An because that would be a disservice to yourself.

Mary

[yamahonkawazuki]

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[cafeboy]

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+1

[wladziu]

You're not gonna hear any arguing out of me, Mary, despite our recent tit-for-tat. 

Your sentiments are what many of us grow up expecting most women to also believe.  We regard it as a sign of true inward beauty.  But, sadly, it doesn't take very many encounters to learn it's rarity.   
Now, if An were smart and decided to learn from this experience, he might become a little bitter (granted, like me) but a lot wiser. 
For instance:
1) Remember when I said that she probably knew without him saying anything?
2) Remember when I said that he'd probably hear her making fun of him?  How do you feel about someone making fun of you about this?  Odd, isn't it?
3) Remember my point of view about poems and such?  Those type of things are lost on a girl like this.  See how she made fun of him, was hitting him before, etc. 
    Maybe An will learn that a woman isn't girlfriend material (for him) just because she finishes his sentences and such, and to pick up on subtle clues from this experience. 

I, and a few others, were urging him to speak his mind, just to avoid the What-If syndrome that would haunt him for years.  If he has a little confidence in himself, he might feel truly insulted that she scorned him and look for a woman of higher caliber. 
There was really no other outcome, unless he approached her with testosterone-fueled confidence and the bravado of someone used to getting what he wants. 
(Had he done that, he might have learned another lesson.)


I'm pretty sure that An will feel guilty about sending her this "letter".  He already is, anyway... notice how he second-guessed himself.  If she scorns him further, maybe he will learn that second-guessing in itself is a sign of a unworthy mate. 
An even bigger mistake (the worst one) will be if he berates himself over the experience.  Or tries to forget about it. 
Learn to pick and choose, instead.  Stop "putting the pu**y on a pedestal", as we say.  Have a little faith in yourself as a man, instead of needing a woman's approval.  It's hard, and people (mostly women) call you an @$$hole, but it's only because you stand up for yourself without bending to their every wish and whim.  See how much bending you've done for this girl, and how you were treated?  Doesn't make sense, does it?  The power of a woman...

[wladziu]

In other words:
You got played!

[annguyen1981]

I'm sure glad I don't have the same outlook in life as you wladziu...  I highly doubt that she was playing me at all.

On that note, she read my message and replied.  I saw the reply about 10 minutes ago, but I'm nervous about opening it.

I know...  I know....  Shut it An, and grow some hair on your balls.

[Jughead]

If you don't open it I'm gonna Kick your Ass.


Believe me I can.

[annguyen1981]

I'd like to see you try.


(I live in Bolivia btw.)

[cafeboy]

Dude just open it and I hope it's good and if it is I mean you don't want to keep her waiting.

[annguyen1981]

Good point CafeBoy.

But I already know it's not gonna be that type of reply.

[yamahonkawazuki]

READ IT AND KNOW 

[annguyen1981]

I'm just happy she's not too mortified and is trying to avoid me.  lol.  she sent me an email right after sending me the reply...  without reading it, I'm sure things will be fine between us.

Dissappointed that we won't be anything more than friends, but that's ok.

[utgunslinger13]

read it you P()ssy!

[bettingpython]

I'm just happy she's not too mortified and is trying to avoid me.  lol.  she sent me an email right after sending me the reply...  without reading it, I'm sure things will be fine between us.

Dissappointed that we won't be anything more than friends, but that's ok.

Friends is fine, why be dissapointed dude? What you have done is established without a doubt where you stand and can now go forth and date without wondering if you're upsetting her or missing out. Don't dwell on this, don't play what if in your head basically don't obsess over this anymore this was a lesson in gaining confidence and acting even when you thought the outcome wouldn't be what you wanted.

You are gonna laugh about this but check out plentyoffish.com it's free thats where my wife and I met. I ddin't have a lot of time to waste being a single dad and working full time so online dating made sense. I tried match.com and eharmony yahoo singles even AFF and out of all those pay sites went on 2 dates with complete phoney's. I dated at least a dozen different women from plentyoffish and even though I am married now we are friends with 3 of the women I dated from there. It's gonna sound bad but quantity is the way to find quality my friend and by getting out and dating you're gonna build some confidence and self esteem. Most of all though just learn to have fun.

[Canonball]

.....and by getting out and dating you're gonna build some confidence and self esteem. Most of all though just learn to have fun.

+1!!!!

[jetboy287]

Hey cafeboy is (IF I COULD FRAME MY MINED---WHERE WOULD IT HANG ?) this from an Eve 6 song?

[cafeboy]

Yep 
Not many folks know that 

[shiznizbiz]

It's gonna sound bad but quantity is the way to find quality my friend and by getting out and dating you're gonna build some confidence and self esteem. Most of all though just learn to have fun.

DUDE!!!!!!  +1 trillion and then some more zeros tacked on the end for good measure.  Perfect advice for EVERYONE.  It is very ver rare to find your soul mate on the first date you ever go on.  and alot of women and men dont open fully so show you thier inner beauty (if there is any) until several dates have gone by and they get comfortable with you.  To quote allanis, You live, You learn. You lose, you learn.

[annguyen1981]

I'm just happy she's not too mortified and is trying to avoid me.  lol.  she sent me an email right after sending me the reply...  without reading it, I'm sure things will be fine between us.

Dissappointed that we won't be anything more than friends, but that's ok.

Friends is fine, why be dissapointed dude? What you have done is established without a doubt where you stand and can now go forth and date without wondering if you're upsetting her or missing out. Don't dwell on this, don't play what if in your head basically don't obsess over this anymore this was a lesson in gaining confidence and acting even when you thought the outcome wouldn't be what you wanted.

You are gonna laugh about this but check out plentyoffish.com it's free thats where my wife and I met. I ddin't have a lot of time to waste being a single dad and working full time so online dating made sense. I tried match.com and eharmony yahoo singles even AFF and out of all those pay sites went on 2 dates with complete phoney's. I dated at least a dozen different women from plentyoffish and even though I am married now we are friends with 3 of the women I dated from there. It's gonna sound bad but quantity is the way to find quality my friend and by getting out and dating you're gonna build some confidence and self esteem. Most of all though just learn to have fun.

Don't get me wrong...  I'm glad I know 100% where I stand, and I won't be asking "what if" about me and her.  I'm just (slightly) disappointed...  I'm not depressed in any way, shape, or form.  I'm actually thrilled that Ive still got such an wonderful person in my life.

To those that are wondering...  here's her reply:

Hi, yeah I knew. You just looked like you were about to melt down or something and I didn't want to hurt you. Yes we are good friends, and I've shared a lot with you, which is why I think you know I have to say no.
I'm not a relationship girl, I don't get emotionally involved with people, and you get REALLY emotionally invested, which would basically result in my hurting your feelings a LOT. We get along extremely well, but I don't feel any romantic feelings for you, it's just friendship.
I'm completely flattered by what an amazing person you think I am, hopefully I can see myself that way some day, lol. I don't want to stop being friends, but I don't want it to be weird either, since I know how hard it must have been for you to admit your feelings to me.
I don't want to give you false hope either, which I have apparently done by acting the way I do with people. I grew up with guys, I act like that with all of them, well the ones I'm good friends with anyway.
I totally get if you need to not talk to me for a while, it's hard to try to be friends with someone when you want more and they don't, so it's up to you. Take some time, go find someone who wants a relationship so you can forget about me romantically

*~K~*

I started laughing out loud when I first read the "about to melt down" part. lol