Oh the Humanity

[bombadillo]

This is something that I got off of calguns and died laughing because its so true.  Enjoy


I must get this off my chest. This is my true horror story. I share this in hopes that my fellow Calgunners may learn from it. Be forewarned. To some of you this may be humorous, to some this may be educational, and some may find themselves throwing up in their mouths (for your sake I hope only a little).


I am still haunted by this unfortunate series of events and hope that sharing this story that I may find some closure.


A few months ago I was attending my Brother-in-law's wedding as a groomsman. After the ceremony I felt the call of nature to the tune of number two. I made my way to where the restrooms were and entered the men's restroom. The restroom consisted of one urinal and one toilet stall. As I entered the restroom, my disabled Uncle-in-law was just entering the stall. Knowing it would take him a bit longer than the average person to complete his deed, I decided to wait outside of the restroom.


Time goes by, my urge grows and desperation starts to set in. To my rescue is my Mother-in-law. Inquiring as to why I am waiting around, I informed her of my situation and she kindly offers to watch the door to the women's restroom so I can use it. Without hesitation I take the offer and carefully announce my entrance to avoid any surprises. The restroom was vacant. Going to the first stall I began my search for a toilet seat cover. Unable to find the usual cover dispenser, I noticed a little black box attached to the side of the stall. I figured; "Hmm...must be a dispenser that dispenses seat covers that unfold." While trying to figure out how to get a cover to dispense I had one hand on top and one on the bottom of this black box. As I manipulated the box something fell into my lower hand. It took me a half second to adjust my focus on the item that fell into my hand. My heart stopped and the signal that would have told my heart to beat told my hand to "DROP IT!" To my absolute horror the item that fell into my hand was...deep breath...a used tampon applicator complete with red and brown crust. In that instant I died. The only thing that revived me was the immediate necessity to wash my hands with the hottest water I could stand.


I didn't need to use the restroom anymore. No, I did not soil myself. The energy I used to start my blood circulating again and move to the sink with God speed must burnt anything that I would have passed.


In conclusion to my story I leave you with this. All men, young and old, avoid women's bathrooms at all costs. If you must use one STAY FAR AWAY from black or other colored mysterious boxes that are not common to men's bathrooms, for evil things they do contain.

[yamahonkawazuki]

lmfao

[Jughead]

What? He didn't know that that was the Used Tampon Despencer for unsuspecting Men that actually weren't men Enough to $h!t in the woods. Bet His Mother in Law was Laughing Her A$$ off. Rule Number #1 in this world....... Never Trust Women.

[tt_four]

ah haha, that was so gross. I wouldn't have messed with it because I would have just assumed it was a tampon dispenser, depending on where the wedding was. I never would've thought about it being a box for used tampons. That's just gross.