I've seen people use a key blank hooked to the cord, stuck in the ignition.

My dad did the same thing on his Buell, except it was a stem/steering lock.  The Buell had a separate cylinder in the neck so he rode off and started tipping a little, and then couldn't straighten the bars out, kept tipping...BAM!  He tried to invent a plug that you could stick in the ignition, but I don't think he was able to fully follow through on it.

Oh, and I definitely have my tank hoses switched, however it happened.  For some reason, every time I looked at a hose diagram it never raised a flag, and I never felt anything weird when I was hooking my hoses up.  But sure enough, I go to ride home on RES and it dies within a mile.  Flip it to ON, ride all the way home to a gas station and put another 1.5 gal. in, switch back to RES and it got me the rest of the way home, and back to work again today.  Which means that multiple days I have been riding well into my Reserve tank without even a clue as to how much fuel I actually had, and how far that would take me.   I'm pretty sure that someone posted a good 3/4 perspective color drawing of the hoses within the last few days that helped me out, but I can't find it.  If someone knows what I'm talking about, make sure that photo gets tagged and stuck in the Wiki and stuff.

Quote from: vinny on August 23, 2012, 06:28:17 AM
Just yesterday i tried riding off with the DISC LOCK still on.
Worst part is that it has a bright yellow cable from the lock to the front brake lever. I just didnt think.

I dont think it damaged anything, except my pride. Scared me though, the sudden juddering and "Oh S###". Thoughts of a bent disc, broken caliper etc. I wont forget it again!

I think everyone who has a disk lock has done that, me included.  I always lock it up against the caliper so it has less chance of rotating very far to cause any significant damage.

When pulling a head on an engine (i.e. motor) in the bike, alone, with no one around.....
........insure you are pulling ONLY the head.

Getting a piston back in the jugs all by yourself late at night is fun.

If adidasguy screams in the bike cave and no one is around, does he make a sound?

Alone in the bike cave, no one can hear you scream.

Connected up the MotionPro carb SyncPro without reading the instructions. You know - hose->>> carb so what could go wrong?
Sucked all the blue fluid out.
(So selling it with a new bottle of replacement fluid because I bought one that doesn't use fluid for more money so I can't be a dumbass again.)

Well, top of Mt Tamborine today, stopped with a mate, 88kms into a 376km ride to take in the views.  Go to head of and bike's back wheel catches the edge of the asphalt/ gravel edge.  Bike starts to tip, not to worry I'll put my foot out, right into a pothole so bike goes right over smashing the clutch lever of the bars, squashing the indicator and bending the rear view mirror back.  No lever means no electric starting.  Considered a clutchless ride home, but didn't fancy a steep descent on no clutch and then Saturday morning traffic trying to judge every traffic light to roll through on a green light.  So ended up having it towed home which took twice as long to arrange and complete than it took to ride there in the first place.  Not to mention the cost, even tried to organise a new lever at a shop that was within my free towing distance (50kms), but would you believe no one had one in stock.  Oh well replacement parts now ordered including a spare clutch lever to keep in the recovery bag so it doesn't happen again (stranded without a clutch lever).

Quote from: ThatOtherGuy on August 25, 2012, 12:37:49 AM
Well, top of Mt Tamborine today, stopped with a mate, 88kms into a 376km ride to take in the views.  Go to head of and bike's back wheel catches the edge of the asphalt/ gravel edge.  Bike starts to tip, not to worry I'll put my foot out, right into a pothole so bike goes right over smashing the clutch lever of the bars, squashing the indicator and bending the rear view mirror back.  No lever means no electric starting.  Considered a clutchless ride home, but didn't fancy a steep descent on no clutch and then Saturday morning traffic trying to judge every traffic light to roll through on a green light.  So ended up having it towed home which took twice as long to arrange and complete than it took to ride there in the first place.  Not to mention the cost, even tried to organise a new lever at a shop that was within my free towing distance (50kms), but would you believe no one had one in stock.  Oh well replacement parts now ordered including a spare clutch lever to keep in the recovery bag so it doesn't happen again (stranded without a clutch lever).

Well its a shame you dont have my number as I have spare clutch levers and I can tow bikes for a cheap price,,,,,,and I live at the bottom of Tambo!!

Quote from: codajastal on August 25, 2012, 12:45:52 AM

Quote from: ThatOtherGuy on August 25, 2012, 12:37:49 AM
Well, top of Mt Tamborine today, stopped with a mate, 88kms into a 376km ride to take in the views.  Go to head of and bike's back wheel catches the edge of the asphalt/ gravel edge.  Bike starts to tip, not to worry I'll put my foot out, right into a pothole so bike goes right over smashing the clutch lever of the bars, squashing the indicator and bending the rear view mirror back.  No lever means no electric starting.  Considered a clutchless ride home, but didn't fancy a steep descent on no clutch and then Saturday morning traffic trying to judge every traffic light to roll through on a green light.  So ended up having it towed home which took twice as long to arrange and complete than it took to ride there in the first place.  Not to mention the cost, even tried to organise a new lever at a shop that was within my free towing distance (50kms), but would you believe no one had one in stock.  Oh well replacement parts now ordered including a spare clutch lever to keep in the recovery bag so it doesn't happen again (stranded without a clutch lever).

Well its a shame you dont have my number as I have spare clutch levers and I can tow bikes for a cheap price,,,,,,and I live at the bottom of Tambo!!

Damn.

I don't know if this is an epic fail or sheer brilliance or both....

So it is night time. Around 11pm. I am riding my push bike on the roads in the estate I lived in at the time (sober, not effected by drugs). Street lights are sparse. As I am riding under a tree my front wheel SLAMS into something dark on the road. The bike starts tipping up. As it does so I leap off the pegs, pass over the handlebars and land on the street running - like some kind of super stunt guy or something - while the bike goes sprawling behind.

I go back to see what it was I'd hit. Two black high metal ramps perpendicular to the road. As I'm picking up my bike two blokes from the property come out to ask if I'm ok. It is now I see a bobcat in the front yard. Who the fuk leaves bobcat ramps on the friggin road? Who needs them to get up a slightly slopped gutter. I just hopped on my undamaged bike and rode away, thankful for my catlike- ninja reflexes.

This wasn't me, but someone that I was with this weekend.

Sunday (yesterday) was really nice and sunny, so I decided to go for a good drive down the windy road next to the bay and when I came back there was a few of my neighbors all standing around with their little kiddies playing in the street. I couldn't drive straight through the kiddies to my driveway, so I coasted over to where the neighbors were chatting and shut off the bike to talk and see what was up.

The conversation revolved around construction in our area, surprise-surprise, and so I got off my bike to stand up and chat. While standing on the left side of my bike with my hand rested on the handlebars (helmet in hand) one of my neighbors decides to lean on the opposite handlebar, but he actually put his weight on it...

The wheel turned, bike started to tip, I couldn't stop it so I push the guy out from getting impaled by my handlebar (that would just be a mess to clean out of my throttle) and let the bike fall over.

The guy is scared shitless, I'm now running around the bike to get it back up and check for damage, and nobody else in 6 people has moved. There's no damage other than another scrape on my frame-slider peg and a scratch on the handlebar end (which is already scratched). The guy is now profusely apologizing and the other guys start saying how bikes are dangerous and such...

I finish picking the bike up, check it again, and then look level with them and say, "Sorry, but a motorcycle is no more dangerous than a car, depends on the driver." and look right at the guy who tipped it over.

We chat for a few minutes more, since some of them seem to see reason in what I said, and then I go on home, but now all of those neighbors wave when I drive by in the morning with my bike, hmm.

Nice reflexes mister.  I've taken a couple of headers off of my mountain bike at night, but I could never land on my feet .  I'll share them as fails because it did happen on two wheels . 

Once I rode into a gate at ~17 mph, it was raining and I wasn't looking for it.  The gate hit right in the center of the neck and I was locked into the pedals so the bike and I rolled over the gate and crashed down on the other side.  Got pretty lucky on that one.  The second time I was riding down a bike path and was going slow [10 mph] because it was dark and ended up driving straight into one of those removable ATV barriers.  The stupid thing is only 3-4 in. wide and my tire goes straight into it, which rocks me forward until the neck hits, which stops the bike dead and sends me super manning off of it.  Landed on all fours and scrapped my knees a little.

I only took one more header that I can think of, and that was when I was heading down a 40 degree decline on the Portal Decent in Moab, UT.  When I hit the bottom the angle was just steep enough to slow the bike and shift my weight slightly over the tipping point.  After that ride I found a crack in the side of the neck and that pretty much sealed the fate of my mountain biking career.

This reminds me of my not-so-long-ago- adolescent self... expect mine, I could clearly see the danger ahead...

Me and my brothers built a ramp for our bikes down by the lake near our old house... it was made from metal roofing, old clothes dryer, and some other scrap bits people dump out there... We thought it would be a good idea to ramp off it, down a hill into the lake...

Worked great for that, but then ideas went south.  I was nominated to let go of the bike in mid-air and land on a mattress, while the bike plumeted down the hill into the lake... IN THEORY

I let go of the bike in mid-air, but the seat got caught on the crotch of my baggy shorts! I couldn't get my feet back on the pedals before landing.  I hit the edge of the mattress, the seat reaked havok on my crotch.  The bike was left on the mattress and I plumeted down the hill into the lake...

9 stitches and 8 years later, its still a big laugh for my brothers, and a story I'm sharing online...

- Bboy

One of the guys I work with has a huge Harley Ultra with about every available add-on like microwave ovens and a waffle-bot. Anyhow, We left work one day and stop at the same gas station. As normal, we are talking trash on each others bikes, and I tell him that thing takes 50ft to turn around, of course he says "no way" and proceeds to show me by putting it into a full lock turn . It actually would've been impressive if he didn't get his 12ft wide handlebars stuck onto the ghey pirate chaps he was wearing and throw that big son of beotch in the middle of the lot. I ran over to make sure he's ok and we both struggle to put it back up. Seriously, heaviest bike ever...

So MY best one was on the first bike I had. Being a young Marine with a little cash I thought I'd be a cool guy and bought a Ducati 748. Well, lets say it's a little different than the dirtbikes I was used to. On the first trip to the gas station on base, I pull up all badass like and proceed to the pump. Only problem was that when I went to get off, the bike wanted to go with me as I never put down the stand. Luckily, it just pinned me against the pump and didn't damage the bike. And one great thing about being on base is that there is always plenty on strong people around to help out.

Upgraded to an R6 shock.  Had to remove the tank, and airbox to drop it down into the frame.  So, some hoses got removed and replaced while I was at it.  Worked late into the night and I didn't want to wake the fiance with warming up the bike.  So, I put my faith in my handywork, and decided my test ride with the new shock and hoses would be to work the next morning.  Not a big deal if the bike doesn't go because I can drive the truck and troubleshoot the bike when I get back.

Next morning comes, and my truck has a flat, so my bike better run!
Starts okay, warms up well, rolls out of the garage on two wheels alright.  Must be okay, right?
I start up the hill away from my house, and get to the first stop sign a mile away from home... and the bike dies, won't restart either.  I pull to the side, take off the seat, and check over everything I can see.  As a last resort I switch to prime to start it, and it works!  Switch back to on, and it dies a minute later...

Not a big deal, it will get me to work even if I have to use prime... Then all the sudden I remember my tank felt light when I took it off last night... Switch to reserve, and head on my way...

FAIL

- Bboy

So first my bike was warm and ready to go fast and at a light i was ready to gun it to get in front of car so i hit the gas upshift in 2nd but instead of 2nd i go to neutral preparing for the shift kick if give you i fall into the tank no crash but looks stupid and super high revs in neutral. Also did that downshifting.

Also the first time i rode the bike. I was getting low on gas and this is the first tank i ever rode on the bike. At a fairly busy road coming to a stop i look at the dash and notice the oil light is on and try to tell me dad to pull over but i didnt notice the bike was dead so in the middle of traffic i had to get off the bike and bring it to a side road and we were trying to start it and start it but wont and finally realized im on reserve for the first time.

Quote from: MNgs500 on October 01, 2012, 12:52:08 PM
So first my bike was warm and ready to go fast and at a light i was ready to gun it to get in front of car so i hit the gas upshift in 2nd but instead of 2nd i go to neutral preparing for the shift kick if give you i fall into the tank no crash but looks stupid and super high revs in neutral. Also did that downshifting.

Also the first time i rode the bike. I was getting low on gas and this is the first tank i ever rode on the bike. At a fairly busy road coming to a stop i look at the dash and notice the oil light is on and try to tell me dad to pull over but i didnt notice the bike was dead so in the middle of traffic i had to get off the bike and bring it to a side road and we were trying to start it and start it but wont and finally realized im on reserve for the first time.

Occam's Razor.
Simplest solution, is most often the correct one.

Left my bike in the driveway, key in the ignition, headlight on, entirely unattended for 5 days. Bike is still there, but the battery is just shot. Won't hold a charge at all. If I jump the bike, it'll run fine on the charging system alone, but even if I run it for 15 minutes all the lights shut off when I kill the engine.

1976, riding my Yamaha MX125C dirt bike, I ride to the gas station by our dirt playground (4-Corners Maple Valley Wa) to get a drink of water from the water fountain. I think I was trying to impress some chick with my wheelie skills? Anywho I grab a handful of Rpm and drop the clutch....ended up on my back with the bike on top of me, handlebars on my chest....me pinned to the ground by the weight of the bike 

Epic fail - RH lane at lights (the fast lane here) front of the queue, light goes green, and the bike quits as it just hits reserve...