Adventure, murder, danger, mystery, lies! All abound here below!  

Ye intruders beware, crushing death and grief, soaked with blood, of the trespassing thief.

Ok, not really... sort of.. But some really crappy shipple(TM) happened today,    (wahoo, yay..) read on if you even care remotely.

[adventure]
Rode the GS down to my buddies house in tha 'OC' to see what was up, have dinner etc... When I was heading out, at around 11pm. I had set my glasses on the tank and to put my helmet on (just how I roll, know?).

[murder]
My buddy was standing next to the bike and he bumped my leg which caused the bike to go into gear. Well, if my day was already not crappy enough, with getting rained on earlier, the glasses flew off the tank and under the tire at the same instant. When the bike jumped I quickly snatched the left bar and grabbed the clutch in instinct. The bike started to idle and then rolled BACKWARDS OVER MY GLASSES.

[danger]
Los Angeles highways suck for anyone who does not know. There are lots of pot holes, misc bull honkey floating around, car parts, hubcaps, old tires, bathtubs, 14 foot bengal tigers, etc...EVERYWHERE. Not to mention hella construction all over the place. Well, if that did not make my night super duper already, the luxury of driving 25 mph up the 405 and back streets where there would be no traffic or lots of light so I could see where the hell I was going was totally CRISP BISCUIT! I mean.. I needed a 250 lb elbino midget (edit: little person) eating a bowl of jello pudding (TM) in a snowglobe riding a raindeer holding a sign that said "PIGGIE BAIT" waving a "Bad Cop, No Doughnut" flag in a sidecar.

Cop stopped me, thought I was drinking. (I NEVER EVER drink and ride, never will you catch me with a drink in me.. It would be from 24 hrs previous at least and my shoe could probably hold liquid longer...)

Even though I told him  *cough* (@$$hole cop) excuze me where was I? oh yea... the story about the glasses, he did not believe it. I got held up for 45 mins. Did I mention that it was cold out? Oh yea, I forgot that. ......Like a wiches er... upper.. chest.. region... (for you ladies out there..)  So the cop held me up, I was hella tired, he finally let me go, (was trying to compensate for his small penor and get me on SOMETHING) the GS would not start after that.

GREAT.

[mystery]
I ended up pushing it to a gas station about (2.5 miles..) and breaking out the tool kit to bust open the air cleaner and carbs when I realized that the idle screw had somehow come totally out. I started cursing zeus for bringing the lightning upon my already tattered and worn sphincter from the other hoopla when I noticed that it had lodged itself among the "fins" in on the cylinder wall outside. (OH SUPER HAPPY GO LUCKY DAY) I fixed it. (Damn lucky took me about 40 minutes cause I could not see..) I suited up and continued upon my way

[lies]
So I got home and when I stepped in the door Ed MicMahon from Publishers Clearinghouse handed me a check for 5 million. I was like "HOLY SHIPPLE(TM)!" I went to the bank, had them cash it out in saqajawea coins, rented a mac truck and towed  1mil to random charity, 1mil to orleans, 1mil to gstwins.com for expenses, 1mil to everyone on gstwins.com for new bikes, and 1mil to myself for new bikes. Then I flew everyone to hawaii so that we could all ride new GSF's and everyone lived happily ever after.

KEEP DREAMING BUDDY. ACTUALLY.

In reality I got home and found out that my roommate had eaten my last slice of pizza and he never re-filled the beer. Since it was after 2:00.... Now here I am writing this... sober, hungry and slightly pissed off, good thing I have gstwins.com to vent.

Quoteand slightly pissed off

I'd be slightly pissed off if any one of those things happened.  All of them?  I'm thinking clock tower... :guns:

D'OH!!  

That sucks ass...  At least you got home.

I had a cop pull me over (in my SUV) that REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY thought I was drunk...  Or stoned...  Or something...

Much to his dismay, he had to let me go... 'cause he had NOTHING on me!

Jomei I am so sorry but I am about peeing cause I'm laughing so friggin hard. What an awesome story you tell! I am so sorry it's all bad stuff, but I can just picture it!!!!

Dude, that sucks ass, I'm glad you're okay - hope you have better luck with your new glasses

wanna know a glasses secret? put one of the ear thingies through your handlebars right by the iginition, so they don't fall off the bike.

and now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

I usually just set my glasses on the seat before I get on the bike and put my helmet on. The seat is a bit grippier on the wireframes than the metal of the gas tank.

I've been putting my gloves on the seat, and putting my glasses on the gloves.  Even more grippy.

Quote from: BadgerI've been putting my gloves on the seat, and putting my glasses on the gloves.  Even more grippy.

+1

Works pretty well I think.

davipu: gi... uhm... jomei...

as it were. i think i am going to try and find some kind of small rubber band/rope/loop type thing to stick onto the handlebars. so that when i take off my glasses i can hang them into the loop.

basically i am thinking about getting one of those hairties (in black) that have the thread over the rubber band. then i am going to tie a knot in it in the middle then put it over the bar. there you go... instant loop to hang glasses on for 30 seconds. either that or a black ziptie.

I think they should buy your story and make a movie...I'm glad you were able to keep your sense of humour! I think I would have been ready to kill small things (and large things!)!!!

That stinks,  Great story though.  I would had felt the same as pandy though, something would have to die.  ESP once I FINALLY got home and there was no pizza or beer :x

Just wanted to say your avatar is awesome!! I bet all the kids in the playground were impressed.

Quote from: Thor S Magic BathtubJust wanted to say your avatar is awesome!! I bet all the kids in the playground were impressed.

Hey...you know that if you won't be able to pass a playground without the fighting the urge to stop and try it yourself.  

Quote from: jomei
Ye intruders beware, crushing death and grief, soaked with blood, of the trespassing thief.

Hell yeah, the Goonies rock. I'm surprised nobody else caught that. Thanks for the flashback.  

Contacts??? :dunno:

Quote from: vfrocketContacts??? :dunno:

Who me?  :dunno: I guess maybe I just showed my age by knowing that quote. In case you are referring to me, that quote is from a movie called "The Goonies".

booty traps.

Quote from: jomeibooty traps.

Cut it out Data. I feel like a Baby Ruth candy bar.