So I laid the bike down coming out of the bike shop where I changed the rear tire ironically to get more grip to lose it 100m out of the shop due to a bit of oil I didn't see on my way out...

So first day off crutches I go to move my bike from the shop parking lot, and the bike won't start.  The lights come on strong, and when I press the starter all the lights dim, but the bike doesn't even turn over.  From what I read, it seems like if the clutch or kickstand switch were broken the lights shouldn't dim at all...so what else could I have done?

If 2006+, headlight goes off when starter pressed.
Check the clutch safety switch.
Also insure in neutral and side stand up. (Only one needed, do both to be sure)
That covers all situations that will keep it from starting.

Guess that means clutch switch...

But why will the lights dim if the starter is pushed if the switch isn't even starting the engine?

What year is the bike?

How long was the bike laid up? The battery is the place to start, check the fluid level. It could have lost some when it went over.

+1. If possible, you could jump start it from another battey, then you'd eliminate any possible battery problems. When my battery died, it acted the same way (the lights would come on, but when i start it the lights would dim and nothing would happen).

You were on crutches... how long did the bike lay on it's side?

Pull both plugs and try to turn it over... your cylinders may be full of oil.

Sounds like a dead battery.

By pass both clutch and side stand switch. Takes 30 seconds and two pieces of wire. Test start. Check headlight brightness for an indication battery is okay or dying.

Reason lights dim if you push starter and it doesn't is because the starter is trying to and is drawing every bit of juice it can and its just not enough. I can't give you more power captain, I can't reach the control panel.